Arrivederci

I looked over, his caramel colored hair fluttering in the breeze.

I sighed because I knew the time had come.

“I’m sorry…I…” I struggled to find the words.

“I know.”

This was one thing that was going to be hard to let go of. The way he understood what I was trying to say, without saying anything.

Several silent moments passed, our knees parallel on the grass underneath the maple tree in my front yard.

A tear rolled down my cheek and he brushed his hand over my face.

“It’s okay-it’s not worth your time to cry about me.”

I laughed, and let out a sob in the process.

I leaned over. “I will never forget these moments. I refuse to let go of what has grown me.”

He suddenly turned his face the other direction.

“Tay, loving can hurt sometimes, but I’ve learned it is worth it. You’ve been worth every moment, even though the end isn’t what we imagined or wanted.”

Tears streamed down my face. I got up on my feet, and I knew it was time.

I put my arms around him, and held on tight. “Goodbye, I guess.”

“God works in amazing ways, don’t you ever forget that Tay.” He slowly let go, and looked into my eyes. “I don’t regret anything for one moment. I knew that continuing this was not God’s plan for either of our lives. May God use this for his glory." 

I nodded my head, holding in tears that suddenly came out of nowhere. 

He let go, and walked towards the street. "Never forget, Tay. God loves you, and you are worth so much to him." 

"Thank you." All I could manage was a hoarse whisper. 

I turned around and headed up the drive away. After I watched him drive away, I ran as quickly as I could to my bedroom.

Laying on my bed, I stared at the ceiling, thinking of all of the memories I had made with him.

I remembered how he had said, "No matter what happens, always remember that God will love you more than I ever can. I will mess up because I'm not perfect, but His love is perfect." 

I remembered our first date at the lake, when he looked into my eyes and told me that I gave him a reason to smile.
I put my head down on the pillow, and sighed.
I would miss him.