Oh, my heart is so heavy at times and my emotions start to take over.
The jealously in my heart just comes out in words and actions that I don't always mean.
I crave attention from a group of friends that will accept me.
I get jealous of those who try to take my spot in the group of friends and of those who appear to get more attention than myself.
When such and such is talking to my friend instead of me, I become upset.
I want everything to be about me and I want everything to make me happy.
Why can't I see that I am already blessed for the friendships I have with these people?
Why can't I be happy for those that are being cherished by my friends instead of wondering why I'm not in their position?
Why can't I be happy for others instead of being so focused on myself?
I have so far to grow, to become more loving and more understanding.
To become less self focused, less jealous and less selfish.
And I need God's strength to put his love flow from my heart even when my emotions want to take over.
Lord, may my heart say, Your face, Lord, I will seek.*
May my heart look to Him, even when my emotions are pushing me to selfishness.
Lord, thank you for being a merciful God to a selfish mortal such as I.
*adapted from Psalm 27:8
I have so far to grow, to become more loving and more understanding.
To become less self focused, less jealous and less selfish.
And I need God's strength to put his love flow from my heart even when my emotions want to take over.
Lord, may my heart say, Your face, Lord, I will seek.*
May my heart look to Him, even when my emotions are pushing me to selfishness.
Lord, thank you for being a merciful God to a selfish mortal such as I.
*adapted from Psalm 27:8
<3
ReplyDeletethank you ❥❥
DeleteOh, this is so much like me. I crave attention from my friends, and get jealous when I'm not the one they're laughing at or whatever. Than you for this good reminder. You are not alone, and God is so good and so merciful to sinners like us.
ReplyDeleteyay, I'm glad we can relate. Craving attention and becoming jealous is something I struggle with. And yes, I am so grateful for his mercy.
DeleteThanks for reading and your comment Maggie ❤
This is so familiar...Such imperfect humans are we, and how perfect God is<3
ReplyDeleteamen girl <3
DeleteThis is so close to my heart. Gahhhh. How do you always express what I'm feeling so eloquently?? But also so real. Your blog and your words are unbelievably appreciated <3 Thank you xxx
ReplyDeleteaw, why thank you! that means so much ❤❤
Deletethis comment is so encouraging to me, I am so grateful!
thank you for reading and commenting, you're the best xxx
Oh I know all too well what you're talking about. This is so true, too true. Amen and amen again<3 Psalm 27:8 oh yes. Keep preaching this.
ReplyDeleteaw, yes. I'm glad I'm not the only one
Delete"Why can't I be happy for others instead of being so focused on myself?"
ReplyDeletehonestly this question has been on my mind for so long. Im such a selfish person and its been my prayer lately that God would help me love others more than myself.
you spoke straight to my heart with this post.
thank you.
may God continue to work in you <3
Oh, I'm so glad I'm not alone in these types of questions.
DeleteIt's so hard to love others, especially when we try to do it on our own. That's why surrendering ourselves so we can love others fully is so important.
Oh this is lovely.
ReplyDeletewhy thank you darlin ❤
DeleteAmen. I will pray for you in this situation.
ReplyDeleteAllie D.
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www.friendlovesatalltimes.blogspot.com
www.sincerelyallied.blogspot.com
www.spreadingmyjoy.blogspot.com
thank you xxx
Deleteamen, darling. so much truth. <3
ReplyDeletethanks addy ❤
Deletedude, this is the truth.
ReplyDeletethis is how it is for me too xx
thank you for this comment, it feels good to not be alone!
Deleteyou are so real.
ReplyDeletelike seriously. this is REAL. this is the real deal. the issues i face i every day. thank you for writing this <3
oh thank you autumn, this is SO meaningful! ❤
Deletethank you thank you for commenting and reading and everything. you're such a babe <3
All the yes. Sometimes, I hatehatehate how selfish I am, and this post describes it perfectly. I'm so grateful God forgives all. <3
ReplyDeleteme too! I am so selfish, and it angers me how much I value myself before others.
DeleteI am so grateful for God's forgiveness. He is so good xxx
I feel this so deep I can't even speAK. you know it. God knows it. make me humble and make me more like you, O God! my soul screams it out. ♥
ReplyDeletethat is the cry of my heart as well ♥
ReplyDeleteOhhhh girl I totally feel this. Have felt this. Know this feeling inside and outside and up and down. Good on you for sharing - it's a yucky thing to recognize in yourself and even yuckier to admit it to other people.... I don't know if it helps if I say it gets better? It's all part of growth ... UGH, THOUGH. Growth sometimes hurts, amirite??
ReplyDeleteoh my. this is just what i needed. beautiful post, and wonderful reminder. thank you :) <3
ReplyDeletexoxo,
m.